I Know We're Pals, But...

He's kind of like an old Army buddy who comes to visit for a couple of days; then two weeks later is reminding you that you're out of vermouth.  I hadn't seen too much of my old chum Al the alligator lizard who spends Summers on the sunny side of our patio.  It's generally part of my routine to check on him as he catches rays from late May through the generally breezy and dry days of late October.

We've been having a particularly cool July and August in Southern California, the coolest since the 1930's according to the experts, and that is why I assumed Al had been making himself scarce.
Nope, that would have been too easy.  It would appear that he has decided that his cold blood is more suited to a different clime.

It wasn't so much a scream,  it was an expletive that told me Linda had encountered a not so welcome surprise in our garage yesterday as we returned from the gym.  (She is not as fond of Al as I am.)  He somehow managed to break into the garage and position himself right next to the door leading to the kitchen.  Not a good move for the old boy since this is where we often chuck various pairs of shoes we are not fond of wearing in the house.  In fact, I'm willing to bet that some of these shoes Linda will not be wearing anywhere ever again.  Naturally, this has created a SITUATION.  Even though alligator lizards eat bugs, spiders and snails it is now my major mission in life to evict Al from the garage.  I really hate to do it.  He is a Padre fan, (and they are in first place), a quiet neighbor and a family guy. (I've counted at least three new "little Als" in the backyard this year.)  
Maybe if I offered him the TV a couple of nights a week to watch the Friars beat up on the Dodgers or the Diamondbacks?  Nah, Linda will never go for that.


If you need me, I'll be in the garage wearing my old combat boots and sporting a large shoe box.  I have a dead spider that might interest my old friend but, frankly, I don't think he'll fall for it.  
I'll come up with something...or be sleeping with Al and the cars tonight.


A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do.