It's my least favorite time of the year.
The NCAA men's basketball tournament has started. It might cost U.S. Employers more than $1.2 billion in lost productivity before the winner is crowned on April 2, but that's not the part that bothers me. What I can't stand is college basketball.
Give me full contact college women's strip poker but spare me the sight of a bunch of pituitary cases in baggy shorts running up and down the maple with their beyond stupid squeaky tennis shoes. (Tennis anyone? Even that would be more fun to watch AND bet on.) Why are they playing basketball in college anyway? Wouldn't we all be better off if college students actually attended a couple of classes now and then? Just today I read that nearly half of the students in California's halls of higher education were enrolled in remedial courses for either math or English deficiencies. Since when do the words college and remedial belong in the same sentence?!!
In the late 80's and early 90's I owned stock in the then publicly traded Boston Celtics. It was fun to kick back in the Lazy Boy and yell at "The Chief", Larry and Kevin when I felt that they were dogging it and costing me money. But that got old eventually, as all investments do, and I sold the stock and renewed my vows of loyalty to baseball and football.
So, count me out of March Madness. We're all "full up"with crazy here. And, did I mention that the guy's shorts are so damn baggy that they look like the VFW Women's Auxiliary is running up and down the court? Well, they DO!
You'll have to excuse me now. My bookie is on the blower with the latest Vegas line on the Padres' chances to win the World Series. We don't need no stinking BRACKETS!
No comments:
Post a Comment