The Only Desert Rat Is HARRY

Cliven Bundy

If ever there was a state where "juice" and "stroke" ruled as coin of the realm it is Nevada.  Who you know and what have they done for you lately is the way score is kept in the Silver State.  Whether it springs from the days of gold mining or the commoditization of gambling and prostitution, Nevada has long promoted a liassez- faire attitude when it comes to commerce, that is unless the BLM and senator Harry Reid are involved.

In case you are unaware, there is a bit of a problem involving Nevada's dumber than drywall douche-nozzle senator Reid and hard working American rancher Cliven Bundy.  Mr. Bundy has been grazing his cattle on BLM (federal) land for years and there is some dispute over whether he is or isn't in arrears on his grazing fees.  Neil Kornze, the head of the Bureau of Land Management and former longtime aide to Mr. Reid, contends that rancher Bundy is a deadbeat cattle pimp and wants to confiscate his herd.  Coincidentally, and I'm sure it is just a coincidence,  Mr. Reid's idiot son Rory is a lawyer representing China's ENN energy group that positively drools over the chance to use the land to construct America's largest solar energy complex.  In other words Harry's kid stands to make a bunch of money from the Chinese commies if he can secure them the rights to slap a buttload of mirrors onto the desert floor. 

Harry Reid, spawn of Satan and political gas bag

Senator Reid chooses to frame this case somewhat differently.  He wants us to believe he has stumbled upon a new found passion for truth, justice and the American way.  Of course if this were the case he would busy himself writing articles of impeachment against the flyweight in the White House for his five years of lawless conduct.   No, when asked his thoughts regarding the current situation with Mr. Bundy and his cows, Harry said, "It's not over.  We can't have an American people that violate the law and get away with it. So it's not over."  (insert guffaws here)
Harry was wearing his sunglasses when that fourteen caret line of political bullshit fell out of his maw so you know he thinks he means business.

"What are you lookin' at?!"

"Moooooooo"

It's interesting to note that the initial beef (no pun intended) regarding Bundy's cud chewing bovine was the assertion that they were destroying the habitat of Nevada's desert tortoise.

In the interest of fair play and total accuracy I decided to question a Mr. Dick Tortoise of Pile of Rocks, Nevada.  I found him at home under cactus in this suburban Las Vegas paradise.

Question:  Mr. Tortoise, any thoughts on the current situation regarding Mr. Bundy's cattle and the scam Harry Reid and his son are running?

Answer:  "I know you'd  think that Harry being a fellow burrowing reptile and all would get him a pass from us.  Not so.  Actually we kind of like the cows and rancher Bundy.  Sure Bossie takes the occasional flop on our head but let a pantload like cousin Harry have his way and, well, next thing you know the desert is full of useless politicians.  Nancy Pelosi anyone? Get outta here!"

Me:  "Thanks Mr. T."

Dick Tortoise: "You're welcome…OOPS…better stand back, Bossie has that look on her face."

"This cactus offers ample cow plop protection."