Drive Through Covid 19 Deliverance

"And now, we welcome to the Lucky Devil stage...Miss Cherry Pie!"

If you're looking to hit the road for a little Covid 19 pandemic confinement relief, Portland, Oregon is your good time destination.  Not because Portland is sophisticated and exciting.  NO, if you've been there you know that it is ground zero for aging granola eating hippies and assorted other left-wing loons. Throw in some funky coffee shops, food trucks, flannel shirts and panhandlers and you've got yourself the full Portland encounter.  Until a couple of weeks ago it was rock bottom on my list of marvelous metros.  That all changed thanks to the creative genius of Shon Boulden the owner of the Lucky Devil Lounge in ever so weird Portland.  Mr. Boulden, with nothing but time and a creative mind to work with, decided to fashion a new experience in the parking lot of his establishment.

The Lucky Devil, you see, is a club that features not only food and firewater but exotic dancers (see ladies who take their clothes off) as well. After managing to get his dancers labeled "essential workers", old Shon proceeded to join forces with a local event company to conger up a drive through strip club.  Lap dances are out of course but according to Boulden, "there's lights, fog and a giant disco ball."  "People are super stoked!  They're happy to see other human beings and to get the strip club experience."  So far the experiment is working as not only locals but groups from as far away as Seattle have traveled to Stump Town to experience the sensual drive through.  Some locals have been known to drive through as many as three times in one night.

The mobile strip experience works like this:  Cars pull in and the music starts playing.  Dancers, wearing face masks and gloves, of course, prance around for the length of a song before food and a free roll of highly prized toilet paper (two-ply) is brought to the car.  According to owner Boulden, after taking a personal test drive through the new outdoor adventure with a Go Pro strapped to his car, declared it an "awesome" experience.  No mention was made concerning what customers might be expected to do with all those dollar bills  known to be in great supply at similar venues.

Fair warning:  If you anticipate a trip to Portland for a visit to the Lucky Devil, please don't feed the bums.  They're plentiful and, like the bears in Yellowstone, can turn aggressive if denied gratification. Keep a sandwich handy and your running shoes on.  Or, you could try throwing some of those singles you brought. $$$$