Please Sir, May I Have Some More?

Stick 'em up Copper!

Thug squirrels have taken over the park near my home.
The little hoodlums are in firm control of the northwest corner of the beautiful city park that I navigate whenever I walk to restaurants, coffee shops, the post office or the marina where I keep my boat.  These little clowns are worse than the Gambino family when it comes to demanding payoffs.  At first I was able to secure safe passage by merely piecing off the little bastards with bulk shell peanuts   purchased reasonably at Costco but now it takes an offering of quality shelled walnuts or almonds to insure safe passage through Squirrelville.

My wife had often told me that squirrels were among the smartest of all animals and I'm beginning to believe she was on to something.  They obviously recognize me on sight and have rightly deduced that I am an easy touch.  The minute my foot hits the sidewalk near their tree hideout they form a line as they rock back and forth on their haunches awaiting my patronage.  I must time each trip carefully to insure that the first recipients of my largess aren't finished with my tribute tidbits by the time I reach the final furry holdup artist.  It's a game of inches that sometimes finds me suddenly sprinting for the safety of the parking lot on the far side of the park.

All things considered these four-legged criminals are kind of fun to watch and are certainly more low maintenance than a dog or a cat.  Perhaps I'll just refer to them as my pets and congratulate myself on freedom from vet bills, fancy pet foods and the idea of having to share my bed with something that might have fleas.  They also have no "accidents" on the carpet.  I wonder how they feel about cashews and pistachios on their old pal Mr. Copper?
A trip to Costco anyone?

"Paulie Walnuts"