Why Must They ALWAYS Look Like This?.

Why not Bridget Fonda?  One of the Olson twins, or even Flo from those Progressive Insurance commercials?  Nope.  Every time somebody gets naked to protest something or to make a point it's ALWAYS a guy.  Never a good looking guy, even they know that keeping things mysterious is the key to good marketing.  Invariably the "nekid" dude is an overweight, not particularly attractive schlub who is oblivious to the stomach churning propensities of his decision to ditch the shirt and pants.

John Brennan, a technology consultant, determined last April that he had been called on to make his displeasure with TSA frisking known to the screeners at Portland, Oregon International airport.  As a protest against TSA personnel, who he felt were harassing him after he tested positive for nitrates on his clothing, he simply decided to chuck the threads and proceed through security sans clothing.  "They are just doing their job, and as a citizen of the U.S. I'm doing my job to protect my constitutional right to privacy," Mr. Brennan said in a telephone interview with the San Jose Mercury News.  "The TSA had already violated my privacy by doing a pat-down and being pulled out of the line.  It's stripping me of any dignity."

The Portland cops thought otherwise and arrested him for indecent exposure.  The end?  Uh....not quite.  That was last April and now, after careful Portland style consideration, a judge in that weirdest of all West Coast cities has found Mr. Brennan NOT GUILTY of the misdemeanor charge.  It seems that the Oregon state Supreme Court has ruled that nudity is protected speech, and old John had disrobed with the idea he wasn't breaking any laws.

I pass this on as a public service for those of you planning Summer travel that involves a stop in the Pacific Northwest.  Make sure that you choose Portland International as your point of departure.  Just pile everything, and I DO mean EVERYTHING,  into a couple of those tubs the TSA folks run through the x-ray machine and you're good to go.  No fuss, no muss...and NO CLOTHES either.  You might even get early boarding.

Once aboard make sure you mention that you're "looking for a little hog-eye for your ham bone" and you should have plenty of room to relax in comfort.

Naked flying--it could catch on.  Portland has always been so cutting edge.

"Somebody frisk me.  I'm packin'!!"