"And don't get my Evinrude crankin' about the price of tickets!" "It's the freakin' Friars!"
I'm hearing this vitriol as I scan my backyard from the patio on a beautiful Saturday afternoon. Where it's coming from, I can't tell.
Can it be my neighbor Jai? He's from Bombay and probably would have trouble locating first base with the help of Garmin and Tom Tom. The neighbor on the other side is never home and has an astroturf lawn; no way he's a baseball fan.
"Who said that?", I query.
"Down here, numbnuts."
It's Al! He's back and he's cranky!Al is the alligator lizard who inhabits the northeast corner of my backyard patio. It has been a cool Spring and he is a little late in establishing his command of the patio domain. He's looking good. Ready, rested and just like Nixon, back from the other side of the sod.
"The Padres suck," he ejaculates. "Why don't they package up Koozy with Giles and trade 'em for some prospects? Then they can bring up Headly from triple A and start givin' the fans the old re-building year jive?" "Hell, I could handle the hot corner...I've been handling the hot corner of your stupid patio all these years ya know", he continues.
I consider that he's probably right but offer, "Well, they have won a couple here lately."
"BFD"....says Al.
I have to admit that he has a point.
Right then a fat grasshopper saunters into Al range. With blinding speed the hapless hopper is on his way to Al's digestive tract...Only the legs remain to dangle from Al's maw.
I believe the Padres could use him.
Tinker to Evers to Al, has a nice ring to it.
Get John Moores on the line!
I wonder if he can hit a breaking ball?
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