A Beer Too Far!

Unable to scare the bejesus out of all of us with tales of rising seas and temperatures a couple of degrees warmer, the global "sky is falling" crowd now postulates that there is a very real danger of a worldwide beer shortage.  Holy climate change Batman!!

According to the University of California, Irvine's Nathan Mueller, "future climate and pricing conditions could put beer out of reach for hundreds of millions of people around the world."  "While the effects on beer may seem modest in comparison to many of the other impacts of climate change, there is nonetheless something fundamental in the cross-cultural appreciation of beer," reports lead author of this horrific report, Dabo Guan of the University of East Anglia, the Harvard of, uh, nowhere.  Computer models, (we know those are NEVER wrong) predict that the possible effects of climate change on the supply of barley could cause beer price increases of 338 percent by 2099.  Oh no!  Of course these are the same researchers with computer models that can't tell us if we need an umbrella this weekend.  So, now every middle-aged guy sporting a substantial Milwaukee goiter is supposed to be quaking in his boots at the thought of high priced and scarce suds?  Hardly.  The climate of our Big Blue Marble has been changing since time began and, in case you haven't noticed, tropical plants no longer grow at the North Pole and there are deserts where inland seas used to be.  Everybody needs to calm down and maybe have a beer or two while it's still possible and let the egg heads who are angling for more research grants (see money) sweat the small stuff.

Global warming?  Frankly, I've been a little chilly since moving to the wilds of North Idaho.  It would be dandy to lose the sweaters, a parka or two, and maybe grow a little barley around here instead of moose munch and huckleberries.  I'm thinking that a banana tree or two would be a nice addition to the southeast corner of the patio and maybe a switch to white wine is in order.

Excuse me while I turn up the air conditioning.